The Forgotten Art of Eye Contact

You just completed an exceptional presentation. You had eloquent vocabulary, zipped around the stage like a ballet dancer, and your voice resonated with powerful emotions, yet you felt the audience response was not impactful. As you walked down the stage, you could feel it; you could see it in their eyes that something was amiss.

Seasoned speakers know that at the heart of an inspiring message is in having meaningful eye contact with their audience. They are aware that "when you lose eye contact with your audience, you lose connection with your audience." Let me walk you through some solid reasons why eye contact is critical on stage and when you communicate in person too. 

• Engaging eye contact with your audience sends a message of confidence and sincerity. It encourages listening, builds trust and believability.

• Establishing eye contact triggers a conversation between you and the audience. Not a single word will be uttered, yet their eyes convey multiple emotions, and they will respond with gestures and animated facial expressions like a smile, a frown, a raised eyebrow, etc. Your monologue becomes a dialogue. This will help you respond suitably and fine-tune your core message.

• Maintaining eye contact helps gauge the mood of the audience and regulates vocal elements like pause, pitch, pace, and power appropriately.

• If you don't look at your audience, they could be happily staring at a pretty soul in the room or wandering the streets outside, physically present but mentally absent.

• Eye contact has an equally important role to play in our daily communication. Our eyes show a basket of emotions like empathy, kindness, concern, and fear without saying a single word. It tells the listener, "I respect, understand and would love to listen to you."

Today, grownups, especially parents, have forgotten the art of creating visual bonds. Some children complain to me: "Sir, my dad doesn’t look at me when we talk. He was busy working on the laptop when I asked him something. “This could seriously dent a child’s confidence and self-image and, even worse, the child could pick up the same bad practice. Appropriate eye contact while talking conveys an unspoken message: "you are important and I am actively listening." 

Whether you are on stage or communicating with a friend, practicing adequate eye contact is an essential skill for compassionate and effective communication. It could mean the difference between an ordinary and extraordinary presentation, and even between being understood and misunderstood.

The skill of eye contact is indispensable and plays a crucial role in communication. Practicing eye contact is one of the finest investments you will ever make, and the best thing of all, it’s free!